Too much worry?
May has been a wonderful month to clear out the #TooMuchStuff that may be getting in the way of our lives. There is freedom in identifying and releasing items that are crowding our spaces and our time. Today, we come to items that our crowding our minds. #TooMuchWorry
Whether it is media-related or is conjured up in our own heads, fear can expand and turn to worry. It has a tendency to hijack our brains and our thoughts and can steer us in some crazy directions. It often pushes out logic and while directing focus to the past or the future, clutters up the ability to concentrate on what is happening right now.
Fear is a valuable tool, one that we can use to raise our awareness and to focus on action. It can also end up becoming a distraction.
“Worry is not an effective strategy to protect children. Worry enhances risk. That’s because as you worry about some imagined danger,
you are distracted from what is actually happening.
Perception focuses your attention; worry blurs it.”
What do we do with fear and worry?
Denying fear does not make it go away.
Fear comes and gives us a message. Our job is to listen and move forward before we become frozen. Whether it is the fear of danger, or the fear of what we are doing wrong as parents, it is important to face it, and bring it out in the open.
Once we know the problem, then our next step is get clear about what we can do about the situation right now. When we take responsibility for what we can control, the results can be powerful.
Talking it out, or asking for help can help to re-frame a frustrating situation.
“No problem can be solved from the same level of
consciousness that created it.”
When we share our fears and worries, we can take a step back and, with the help of others, begin to discover the current fear and how we can deal with that in the moment so that it doesn’t clutter our minds moving forward. Fear is the first ingredient of courage. Courage = feeling fear + finding the strength to do what needs to be done.
This week, ask yourself:
Am I using my fears and worries as a distraction from what really needs to get done?
Are my fears about my child’s future behaviours distracting me from today’s misbehaviours?
Are there any fears or worries stopping me from moving forward?
Who can help me to get clear about a solution to this nagging worry?
We encourage you to hang in there! Parenting is not a smooth road. There are lots of bumps along the way. Rather than getting trapped in the bumps, we can look clearly, figure out how to get through the rough patch and then face the next bit ahead. We are all learning.