Put your money where your mouth is
Talk is cheap!
What do we mean by that? There is no question that talking to our kids and talking WITH our kids has value. Talk builds vocabulary, shares values, grows brain pathways and establishes relationships. That being said, we love action.
One of our oldest and most beloved mantras at Parenting Power is:
ACT DON’T YAK!
About 75% of what our kids learn from us comes from our actions. Only 25% comes from what we tell them…they really aren’t listening as much as we would like them to. They ARE watching everything that we do!
So rather than spending a whole bunch of hot air trying to reason, articulate, entertain and attend to your kids whining and misbehaviours, invest in some clear, concrete action:
1. Prepare short scripts:
I hear whining, try that again.
It sounds like you want some attention – how can you ask for that politely?
How can we solve that problem together?
2. Follow through with a pre-arranged consequence:
I see you are choosing not to play with that truck today – trucks drive on the ground. (remove truck and move on)
Your body is telling me it is time to go home. (leave the groceries and go)
I’ll have the car keys until you show me that you know what time to be home.
3. Give your kids a chance to own their behaviour:
Make a plan for how they will handle a situation. (language and actions)
Teach them to make amends.
Let us know what you think…we listen when you talk!