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Do you see your children for who they are today?
Parenting Power Admin May 14, 2015 No Comments

Do you see your children for who they are today?

Humans tend to be creatures of habit. It is easy to get caught up in the day to day tasks. While, these routines simplify our lives and help us to function, they may also distract us from the act of Being Present.

Many of the routines created back in September are now out of date.During this school year, our kids have grown and changed. It’s easy to see our kids as who they were back in the fall, or even the previous fall; when in reality, they have become new people with different abilities and interests.

Today, we’re asking:

Do you see your children for who they are today?

When we see our kids as who they used to be, or when we expect our kids to be further along than they are, we aren’t parenting the kids that are right here, right now. Both of these situations can be limiting.

When kids are great talkers, we can sometimes overestimate their overall development. We may expect them to be able to manage things more maturely than they are able. When they don’t, we may become frustrated and punish them for something beyond their abilities. Having realistic expectations for your children, and taking the time to teach them new skills will set your kids up for success.

The opposite situation is equally as limiting. At Parenting Power, we believe that kids are capable! Oh sure, it might be faster and easier for parents to do for kids those things that they can do for themselves. However, this process is actually robbing kids of the opportunities to learn that they are capable, and that they have a purpose.

It is NOT our job as parents, to coddle our kids and to solve their problems. When we stop and see them for who they are right now, we realize that this week, they are capable of learning a new way to help themselves.

Three signs that you need to see your kids more clearly

– If you have kids who are nervous and hesitant to try new things, it’s possible that they have been given very little opportunity to do things for themselves. They may be frightened to try something in case they fail.They may not believe that they are capable because Mom and Dad have done it for them up to this point. These kids do not know how capable they are.

– If you hear from school that your child functions really well and yet, the same child won’t do anything to contribute at home, your efforts to do things for your child may have stopped him from learning to do it on his own.

– If you hear yourself complaining that you do everything around the house and that your child does nothing, that’s a clue that it’s time for you to take the time to teach her how she can contribute and hold her accountable. The attached age-appropriate chore charts will help you to know what is developmentally appropriate for your child.

Seeing our kids for who they are today also means recognizing their current strengths; noticing them using their manners with others, showing kindness and taking responsibility. This is when we get a chance to use the Language of Encouragement with our kids.

Be present and see your kids for who they are today… they are pretty great!

This week: Ask yourself, “What am I doing for my child today that s/he could be doing for her/himself?” Make a plan to teach one new task this week. Notice when things work well – don’t over praise, just notice – “Thanks for using your manners today.”

Age Appropriate Chores 2- 4
Age appropriate chores 5 +

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Need Help with your Family Meetings?
We want to see you make this change for your family. For this week only, you can download our Family Meetings .mp3 for only $10!!
Get it here.

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